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There are two main hypotheses for why this happened.Zajonc thought it was because a long life together meant shared experiences that left similar lines on faces, and that couples would therefore begin to look more similar.Zajonc's theory of emotional face-mirroring was based on a basic principle: We imitate the people we're around the most.This phenomenon, called "unconscious mimicry," has been known for ages, and it's why we unconsciously take on the intonation of our friends' voices, or copy our boyfriend's stance at the bar.Forget the obsession with band T-shirts or the inability to play Monopoly without screaming; you may not have worked out with your ex simply because they weren't that genetically compatible with you.
It's not hard to understand why — you like somebody who knows what you're talking about when you moan about your 9-to-5 and college loans — but on a certain level, similarity is also determined in terms of genetics. A study from 2014 shows that white people in particular pick lifetime mates who have similar DNA.One thing's for certain, though: Just because you look similar doesn't mean you'll start to think the same way.A 2010 study showed that people who'd been married for 40 years were just as definitively different in their personalities as they had been at the start of their marriages, even if they now shared habits, homes, and mortgages. Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage?Those first two can be stopped, but science has declared that, indeed, the longer you're with a partner (and we're talking seriously long-term here; decades, not months), the more you resemble each other.It's called convergence of appearance , if you want to get technical.